Thursday, October 19, 2006

A House Hubby, Baked Garlic Cheese Grits, some good jokes..and the "Shehag"

Well Sir...any a ya that visits the Cookshack regularly have undoubtedly noticed my prolonged absence....well my friends...been real busy bein an all American "House Hubby"........

Now Sir....bout a week or so ago my lovin bride had some major surgery on her foot...real painfull stuff....and she's a gonna be laid up fer 4-6 weeks or guessed it....I just been doin all the cookin (don't mind that part), cleanin, walkin the dog and the general all around errands and ain't had much time fer the old blog....and I must say....I missed doin it....

But now I'm back. So....time bein kinda constricted, I'm just gonna be a might lazy and put up jokes and stuff and a recipe's fer grits that y'all are really gonna like...if'n ya like real good tastin grits that here ya are.....

Baked Garlic Cheese Grits

6 cups chicken broth
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
2 cups regular grits
16 ounces Cheddar, cubed
1/2 cup milk
4 large eggs, beaten
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter
8 ounces grated sharp white Cheddar

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 4-quart casserole dish.

Bring the broth, salt, pepper, and garlic powder to a boil in a 2-quart saucepan.

Stir in the grits and whisk until completely combined. Reduce the heat to low and simmer until the grits are thick, about 8 to 10 minutes.

Add the cubed Cheddar and milk and stir. Gradually stir in the eggs and butter, stirring until all are combined.

Pour the mixture into the prepared casserole dish. Sprinkle with the white Cheddar and bake for 35 to 40 minutes or until set.

Well Sir....that thar recipe makes fer a real great brunch....OK...on to some good jokes about messin around on yur spouse......courtesy of David over at The Doubtin Thomes Journey...

The 1st Affair:

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.
One day they went to her place and made love all afternoon.
Exhausted, they fell asleep and woke up at 8 PM.
The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes
Outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.
He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
"I can't lie to you," he replied, "I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had sex all afternoon."

She looked down at his shoes and said:
"You lying bastard! You've been playing golf!"
The 2nd Affair:

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a son. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.
The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.
The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.
He told his wife: "There's no way I can be the father of this baby.

Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!
Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied: "Not this time!"
The 3rd Affair:

A mortician was working late one night. He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery.

Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen! "I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," the mortician commented, "I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity."

So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home.

I have something to show you won't believe," he said to his wife, opening his briefcase.

"My God!" the wife exclaimed,
"Schwartz is dead!"
The 4th Affair:

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you," she said, " pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh it's a statue," she replied, "the Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too."

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer. "Here," he said to the statue, have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing."
The 5th Affair:

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.

"Certainly, Sir , that'll be one cent."
"One Cent?" the man exclaimed.

He glanced at the menu and asked:"How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?"
"A nickel," the barman replied.

"A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The bartender replied: "Upstairs, with my wife."

The man asked: "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
The bartender replied:
"The same thing I'm doing to his business down here."
The 6th Affair:

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly: "I have something I must confess."
"There's no need to, " his wife replied.

"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace.

I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!"
"I know," she replied, " now just rest and let the poison work."

Well Sir....y'all take care now and God Bless....and if'n y'all don't like the "God Bless" part.....just don't come around no more.....Cookie....

...Oh...and BTW....any a you Lib's or Moonbats that accidentally tripped across this c'here blog....the "Shehag" is gonna be at Syracuse University tonight at Hendricks Chapel. I knew I saved them rotten eggs fer some reason....I spose I'll get arrested...but at my age...what a they gonna do....probation at worst....but it'll be worth it.....