Just pokin some rib's... and... havin some fun with the ACLU...

OK...my last two posts were aimed at the inept management folks at the United States Postal Service...let's hope they can correctly address and resolve the identified problem and learn from it...but...till then...here's a cute little joke about (and for) the good folks who wurk down in the trenches durin this busiest time of the year at the PO.....

...and Oh...BTW...a few folks asked me what the flag in the previous post is...its the nautical international distress flag (something like SOS).....

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mails that had illegible addresses.

One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.

The letter read:

"Dear God, I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension.

Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension check. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me?

Sincerely, Edna"

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman. The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.


Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read, "Dear God, How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends.

We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift. By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those bums at the Post Office.

Next...As Art Linkletter ( I know...you younger folks don't even know who the hell he is) used to say..."Kids say the Darnedest things..."...

A teacher was doing a study testing the senses (taste) of firstgraders using a bowl of lifesavers.

The childrens responses...

Red......................Cherry
Yellow..............Lemon
Green....................Lime
Orange...............Orange

Finally the teacher gave them all HONEY lifesavers.

After eating them, none of the children could identify the taste.

"Well," she said, "I will give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father.

"One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled,

"Oh my God, they're ass holes!"



...and speakin of Assholes( great Seg-way huh )....

HAVE SOME FUN WITH THE ACLU...

Want to have some fun this CHRISTMAS?
Send the ACLU a CHRISTMAS CARD! I know I'm sendin mine out today...and maybe one or two after that.....

As they are working so very hard to get rid of the CHRISTMAS part of this holiday, we should all send them a nice, CHRISTIAN, card to brighten up their dark, sad, little world.

Make sure it says "Merry Christmas" on it.

Here's the Addresses, remember...BE NICE... don't be rude or crude.

ACLU
125 Broad Street
18th Floor
New York, NY 10004

ACLU
1031 E Washington St
Indianapolis, In 46202

Two tons of Christmas cards would freeze their operations because they wouldn't know if any were regular mail containing contributions... So spend 39 cents and tell the ACLU to leave Christmas alone. Also tell them that there is no such thing as a Holiday Tree. . . It's a Christmas Tree even in the fields!!

And pass this on to your email lists. We really want to communicate with the ACLU! They really DESERVE us!!