Thursday, February 01, 2007

A couple a OBG's fer y'all....

Well Sir...we'll start with a blonde joke.....

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he’s doing a show in a small town in Arkansas.

With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting:

“I’ve heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person’s hair have to do with her worth as a human being?

“It’s guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as persons.”

“Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general, and all in the name of humor!”

The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, “You stay out of this, mister! I’m talking to that little smart-ass on your knee!”

First Sex...

A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday
night to meet, and have dinner with her parents.

Since this is such a big event, the girl announces
to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like
to go out and make love for the first time.

The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex
before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to
get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his
first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about
an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know
about condoms and sex.

At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack
because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first
time and all.

That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents
house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm
so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"

The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner
table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy
quickly offers to say grace and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer,
with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no
movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes
with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and
whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were
this religious."

The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea
your father was a pharmacist."