Just some Tuesday tidbits....WARNING... GROSS PHOTYGRAFF AHEAD....
Well Sir....here's anuther warning as to why ya never should cook with Bacon Grease (Lard)....it makes yur feet small.....
...and this speaks fer itself.....
...DAMN...in 21 years of Police work....I never had a partner that looked like this......talk about makin a big Police bust....
...and this is how we tell just how cold the water is here on Oneida Lake, NY...._______________________
...and a bunch of Hillary jokes sent to me by my very good friend frum Eagle Lake, Texas....Sue Gertson....Thanks Mate!
*Hillary Clinton said that her childhood
dream wasto be an Olympic athlete. But she was not
athletic enough. She said she wanted to be an
astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women.
She said she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy.
Should she be telling people this story? I mean she's
basically saying she wants to be president because
she can't do anything else." --Jay
Leno *
*"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be
running for president in 2008. You know why I think
she's running? I think she finally wants
to see what it's like to sleep in the president's
bed." --Jay Leno *
*"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen.
Hillary Clinton running for president. Apparently,
some Democrats don't like the idea, while
others hate it." --Conan O'Brien *
*"In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton
wondered why President Bush can't find the tallest
man in Afghanistan.
Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the
fattest intern under the desk." --Jay Leno *
*"Former President Bill Clinton said that if his
wife, Hillary, is elected president, he will do
whatever she wants.
You know Bill Clinton-- when he makes a vow to Hillary,
you can take that to the bank." --Jay Leno *
*"Did you know Bill and Hillary Clinton were born
under the same sign?
Know what sign? 'For Sale.'" -Jay Leno *
*"A student from the University of Washington has
sold his soul on eBay for $400. He's a law student,
so he probably doesn't need it, but still,
that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said,
'Hey, at least I got some furniture and a Senate
seat for mine." -Jay Leno *
*"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants
legislation to allow all ex-felons to vote. See,
this way all the Clinton's former business
partners can vote for her in 2008." --Jay Leno *
*"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out.
So much of her personality shines through, that in
the end, you, too, will want to sleep with an intern."
- Craig Kilborn *
*In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,'
Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton,
falling in love with him, getting married, and living
a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife.
Then on page two, the trouble starts." - Jay Leno *
*"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was
having an affair, she said I could hardly breathe,
I was gulping for
air.
' No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said."
- David Letterman *
*"Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York,
announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever
running for office of the President of the United
States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly
disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of
becoming a two-impeachment family."
- David Letterman *
*"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her
first party in her new home in Washington . People
said it was a lot like the parties she used
to host at the White House. In fact, even the
furniture was the same." -
Jay Leno *
*"Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President
Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon
dioxide emissions, saying a promise made,
a promise broken. And then out of habit, she
demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch."
- Craig Kilborn *
*"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired
woman in America. Women admire her because she's
strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows
herhusband to cheat and get away with it."
- Jay Leno *
*"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the
great state of New York. When they swore her in,
she used the Clinton family Bible. . the
one with only seven commandments."
-David Letterman
*Hillary Clinton said that her childhood
dream wasto be an Olympic athlete. But she was not
athletic enough. She said she wanted to be an
astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women.
She said she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy.
Should she be telling people this story? I mean she's
basically saying she wants to be president because
she can't do anything else." --Jay
Leno *
*"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be
running for president in 2008. You know why I think
she's running? I think she finally wants
to see what it's like to sleep in the president's
bed." --Jay Leno *
*"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen.
Hillary Clinton running for president. Apparently,
some Democrats don't like the idea, while
others hate it." --Conan O'Brien *
*"In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton
wondered why President Bush can't find the tallest
man in Afghanistan.
Probably for the same reason she couldn't find the
fattest intern under the desk." --Jay Leno *
*"Former President Bill Clinton said that if his
wife, Hillary, is elected president, he will do
whatever she wants.
You know Bill Clinton-- when he makes a vow to Hillary,
you can take that to the bank." --Jay Leno *
*"Did you know Bill and Hillary Clinton were born
under the same sign?
Know what sign? 'For Sale.'" -Jay Leno *
*"A student from the University of Washington has
sold his soul on eBay for $400. He's a law student,
so he probably doesn't need it, but still,
that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said,
'Hey, at least I got some furniture and a Senate
seat for mine." -Jay Leno *
*"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants
legislation to allow all ex-felons to vote. See,
this way all the Clinton's former business
partners can vote for her in 2008." --Jay Leno *
*"Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out.
So much of her personality shines through, that in
the end, you, too, will want to sleep with an intern."
- Craig Kilborn *
*In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,'
Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton,
falling in love with him, getting married, and living
a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife.
Then on page two, the trouble starts." - Jay Leno *
*"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was
having an affair, she said I could hardly breathe,
I was gulping for
air.
' No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said."
- David Letterman *
*"Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York,
announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever
running for office of the President of the United
States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly
disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of
becoming a two-impeachment family."
- David Letterman *
*"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her
first party in her new home in Washington . People
said it was a lot like the parties she used
to host at the White House. In fact, even the
furniture was the same." -
Jay Leno *
*"Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President
Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon
dioxide emissions, saying a promise made,
a promise broken. And then out of habit, she
demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch."
- Craig Kilborn *
*"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired
woman in America. Women admire her because she's
strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows
herhusband to cheat and get away with it."
- Jay Leno *
*"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the
great state of New York. When they swore her in,
she used the Clinton family Bible. . the
one with only seven commandments."
-David Letterman
posted by Cookie..... @ 3:59 PM
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