Thursday, September 06, 2007

Ya gotta love a Redneck......

Well Sir....this here test was too good NOT to steal frum my buddy the Chief over at Smoldering Embers......


Students were assigned to read two books, "Titanic" and "My Life" by Bill Clinton, and to compare and contrast them in a book report.
One smart-assed student turned in the following, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!

His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.

Titanic: - $29.99
Clinton: - $29.99

Titanic: - Over 3 hours to read
Clinton: - Over 3 hours to read

Titanic: - The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and
subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton: - The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love , and
subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic: - Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton: - Bill is a bullshit artist.

Titanic: - In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton: - Ditto for Bill.

Titanic: - During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton: - Ditto for Monica.

Titanic: - Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton: - Let's not go there.

Titanic: - Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton: - Monica's forced to return her gifts.

Titanic: - Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton: - Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

Titanic: - Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton: - Monica...ahh, let's not go there, either.

Titanic: - Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton: - Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing