Wednesday, August 01, 2007

A question or two..."Stressed out Women-folk.. Kettle math...and L.A. Traffic..

A couple a tough questions fer ya....

Question 1: If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.

Question 2: It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts.

Here are the facts about the three candidates. Who would you vote for?

Candidate A... Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B... He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C... He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be our choice?

Decide first... no peeking, then scroll down for the response.

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:

If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven.


1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unf_ _ k you.
2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.
3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?
5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of
self- control?
11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
14. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet!
15. Back off!! You're standing in my aura.
16. Don't worry. I forgot your name too.
17. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.
18. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
19. Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
20. Chaos, panic and work here is done.
21. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
22. You look like shit. Is that the style now?
23. Earth is full. Go home.
24. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?
25. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
26. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
27. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
28. Look in my eyes.....Do you see one ounce of give-a-shit?