Saturday Sundries.....

Well Sir....does this Election remind y'all of anything?....


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...and...we just gotta have some Saturday mornin cartoons.....


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Well Sir...my good amiga Susan Gertson sent me this funny "Lone Ranger" story frum a show I wouldn't watch if'n it was the last TV show on the tube...the David Letterman Show....



...and fer those of you who might be askin yurselves..."WhoTF is The Lone Ranger?"...here's who he is.....



Cookies Note: When I was growin up in that late 40's, our family was the first family on our block to have a TV set, and, throughout the day there were NO TV shows on at all until 7:00PM at night, at which time "The Lone Ranger" came on. The rest of the day was all a "Test Pattern" (how many of y'all remember those?).

During those days, just about every kid in the neighborhood (and beyond) showed up at my house at around 6:45 or so to get a good seat fer the show.....

Oh Ya...and Mom would usually make a huge batch of real good "Home Made" Popcorn with tons of real butter on it..... you know, the type where you poured some oil and pop corn into a pan and had to continually shake the pan over the heat until it all popped.....


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....and here be a great reason why y'all should NEVER Ice Fish in Alaska....


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I've posted these afore but regardless, they're always good fer a laugh.....

Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great!

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole?

Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....

FIRST TESTIMONY:

I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly,

"How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?"

I turned around and walked back out and never went back.

My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.

After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.

He asked if he could help me.

Without thinking, I looked at him and said,

"I think I like playing with men's balls"

THIRD TESTIMONY:

My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts.

As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.

I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."

My sister started to laugh hysterically.

The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:

While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok.

I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.

I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.

To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,

"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"

The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.

Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.

I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.

The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly.

One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands It was very busy, with a full dining room.

While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.

The realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No".

I kept thinking "Oh Lord, th at child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."

Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
"No," he replied.

I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny did you have an accident ? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"

While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.

An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY: This is the best one....

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks.

What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!

We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:

"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"

Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
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....Awwwwwe...What a Sweet Little Girl.......



Thanks "Fish" fer sendin that along.....
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I posted alot of comedy today because tomorrow, Easter Sunday, holds a very special meanin fer the Cookie man....I hope y'all stop by The Cookshack and hear a story of mine...