What do Roosters and Politicians have in common.....??
John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets', and ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs.
The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.
The farmer's favorite rooster was old Al, a very fine specimen he was too, but on this particular morning John noticed old Al's bell hadn't rung at all! John went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.
But to Farmer John's amazement, old Al had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Al , he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.
The result...The judges not only awarded old Al the No Bell Piece Prize but they awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well.
Clearly old Al was a politician in the making: who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.
Vote carefully this year...the bells are not always audible.
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"Charlie The Cop" sent me the next few jokes.....
St. Peter is at the Pearly Gates checking up on the people waiting to
enter Heaven.
He asks the next one in line, "So, who are you, and what did you do on
Earth?"
The fellow says, "I'm Barack Obama, and I was the first black to be
elected President of the United States. "
St. Peter says, "The U.S.? A black President? You gotta be kidding me!
When did this happen?"
And Obama says, "About twenty minutes ago
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A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man
reading a book, and noticed he had his collar
on backwards.
The little boy asked why he
wore his collar backwards.
The man, who was a Priest, said:
'I am a Father.'
The little boy replied:
'My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that.'
The priest looked up from his book and answered:
'I am the Father of many.'
The boy said:
'My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two
grandchildren and he doesn't wear
his collar that way!'
The Priest, getting impatient, said:
'I am the Father of hundreds'
and went back to reading his book.
The little boy sat quietly thinking for
a while, then leaned over and said:
'Maybe you should wear a condom and
your pants backwards instead of your
collar."
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"Chicago Charlie" sent me this as well...I think you'll get a kick outta it...
"Why ya don't want Cops as yur Friends."
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This is "Joe American", he makes good sense. **Sigh** which is probably why no politicians are listening to him....
Listen up McCain, Obama...and yes, even you Hillary....
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