Saturday, January 19, 2008

Adapt...Improvise and Overcome....

Well Sir...when cookin...I'm sure y'all have heard the sayin "Everything's in there cept'n the Kitchen Sink". Well Sir...In warfare....sometimes you gotta use that old Marine and Seabee sayin...Adapt, Improvise and Overcome....and thats just what the Navy did during "Nam" when munitions got short.....

My good buddy Pat frum A Day in the Life....PRH sent me this one...

"What the Hell is That on his Right Wing????"

The result of MacNamara's ordnance shortage in 'Nam..... .we "gave them everything we had..... EVERYTHING!" A true story from VA-25.

Just as this AD was being shot off, we got a 1MC message from the bridge, "What the hell was on 572's right wing?"

For those too young to remember, during the Vietnam conflict, carriers were so woefully short of ordinance that missions were often launched with only a half load just to keep the sortie rate up so that the REMF's in DC would not send out blistering messages about failure to support the war effort, etc.

Given that the loss rate approached, and sometime exceeded, one aircraft a day, all will understand that there was a degree of reticence to launch with less than a full load -- if I must dance with the elephant at least let's make it worth while. Nevertheless, the indomitable spirit of the carrier aviators, and their squadron-mates, prevailed in some rather perverse way.

I have every hope that today's successors to the mantel left at the Cubi "O" Club bar persevere as well. Kick the tires, light the fires, bolt for the blue and brief on guard -- last one up is lead. Back in 'Nam', if you weren't on USS MIDWAY in Oct 1965, I thought you'd get a kick out of one squadron's ingenuity. Yes, this really happened. Once again history is stranger then fiction, and a lot funnier:

The USS Midway VA-25's Toilet Bomb.

In October 1965, CDR Clarence J. Stoddard, Executive Officer of VA-25 "Fist of the Fleet", flying an A-1H Skyraider, NE/572 "Paper Tiger II" from Carrier Air Wing Two aboard USS Midway carried a special bomb to the North Vietnamese in commemoration of the 6-millionth pound of ordnance dropped. This bomb was unique because of the type... it was a toilet!

The following is an account of this event, courtesy of Clint Johnson, Captain, USNR Ret. Captain Johnson was one of the two VA-25 A-1 Skyraider pilots credited with shooting down a MiG-17 on June 20, 1965. Clint Johnson was also a classmate and Company-mate of mine at the Naval Academy.

572 was flown by CDR C. W. "Bill" Stoddard. His wingman in 577 was LCDR Robin Bacon, who had a wing station mounted movie camera (the only one remaining in the fleet from WWII).

The flight was a Dixie Station strike (off South Vietnam) going to the Delta. When they arrived in the target area and CDR Stoddard was reading the ordnance list to the FAC, he ended with "and one code name Sani-flush".

The FAC couldn't believe it and joined up to see it. It was dropped in a dive with LCDR Bacon flying tight wing position to film the drop. When it came off, it turned hole to the wind and almost struck his airplane.

It made a great ready room movie. The FAC said that it whistled all the way down. The toilet was a damaged toilet, which was going to be thrown overboard.

One of our plane captains rescued it and the ordnance crew made a rack, tailfins and nose fuse for it. The squadron flight deck checkers maintained a position to block the view of the Captain and Air Boss while the aircraft was taxiing onto the catapult. Just as it was being shot off we got a 1MC message from the bridge, "What the hell was on 572's right wing?"
Now Sir...There's been plenty of times in my life when I've been in a fight that I've hit someone in the head....but I never Hit em WITH the Head before.....

Now Sir...fer those of you lookin fer a job we have......
Subject: Gynecologist Assistant

A young man is walking by the Gynecologist's office in Omaha, Nebraska and sees a help wanted sign for a Gynecologist's Assistant. He is interested and goes inside to inquire about the job. He asks the receptionist about the job, She finds the job announcement and reads it to him.

The Gynecologist's assistant, prepares the patient for the doctor's examination, by removing the females underwear, washing and cleaning the genital area , then using shaving cream and a razor shaves the pubic hair. The pay is $45,000 to start.

"That sounds great" says the young man.

"This will require you to go to Gulfport Mississippi" says the receptionist.

"Is that were the job is"? he asks.

"No, that's where the end of the line is".

OK Guy's....If'n ya wanna find out just how COOL ya were back in High School....take this here Test.......Go Here....

...and...turn yur sound on, smoke em if'n ya got's a good Military song called...

"Beer fer my Horses"....

Gotta thank Missy Susan Gertson fer sendin me that one......