Saturday Sundries... and sumthin totally NEW...
Now Sir...I posted these about 6 months ago...but a few folks E-mailed me about them... so... here be some ad's frum Yester-year, and ...what makes them humorous is cause they're real...
** Click the Ad to Enlarge ** if'n yur eye's ain't what they used to be...
______________________________
Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself nude in a mirror, after a relaxing bath.
Her frustration over her lack of ability to lose weight was depressing her.
In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help...
"God...if you take away my love handles, I'll devote my life to you," she prayed.
And at that very moment, her ears fell off...........
_____________________________
Two families moved from Saudi Arabia to the USA .
When they arrived the two fathers made a bet - in a year's time which ever family had become more American would win.
A year later they met again. The first man said,
"My son is playing baseball, I had McDonald's for breakfast and I'm on my way to pick up a case of Bud. How about you?"
The second man replied, "Fuck you, towel head."
__________________________________
My wife and I went to the rodeo and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, '
"THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR"
My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ....Smiled and said,
"He mated 50 times last year."
We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,
"THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR"
My wife gave me a healthy jab and said,
"WOW~~That's more than twice a week! .........You could learn a lot from him."
We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,
"THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR"
My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,
"That's once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one."
I looked at her and said,
"Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow."
Honestly-----My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.
________________________________
Well Sir...movin on...my good amiga Nicki from over at The Birthplace of the Process of Illogical Logic wrote a post about how Barack Hussein Obama may be having troubles because of his middle name...so..she felt that all he has to do is just use his initials...B O. Then it occurred to her that B.O. also stood fer Body Odor...
Now Sir...Missy Nicki is one enterprisin young woman who knows her way around a "Photo-Shop"... so she sat down to her trusty puter and when the smoke had cleared...voila....came up with this great design...... I love it!
She sent me the above humorous photygraff/logo... and not to be outdone...I asked myself...Cookie... what takes care of and eliminates body odor? I then e-mailed her with an idea I was having ...and she did the rest on her Photo-shop....
____________________________
** Click the Ad to Enlarge ** if'n yur eye's ain't what they used to be...
______________________________
Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself nude in a mirror, after a relaxing bath.
Her frustration over her lack of ability to lose weight was depressing her.
In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help...
"God...if you take away my love handles, I'll devote my life to you," she prayed.
And at that very moment, her ears fell off...........
_____________________________
Two families moved from Saudi Arabia to the USA .
When they arrived the two fathers made a bet - in a year's time which ever family had become more American would win.
A year later they met again. The first man said,
"My son is playing baseball, I had McDonald's for breakfast and I'm on my way to pick up a case of Bud. How about you?"
The second man replied, "Fuck you, towel head."
__________________________________
My wife and I went to the rodeo and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, '
"THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR"
My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ....Smiled and said,
"He mated 50 times last year."
We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,
"THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR"
My wife gave me a healthy jab and said,
"WOW~~That's more than twice a week! .........You could learn a lot from him."
We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,
"THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR"
My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,
"That's once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one."
I looked at her and said,
"Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow."
Honestly-----My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.
________________________________
Well Sir...movin on...my good amiga Nicki from over at The Birthplace of the Process of Illogical Logic wrote a post about how Barack Hussein Obama may be having troubles because of his middle name...so..she felt that all he has to do is just use his initials...B O. Then it occurred to her that B.O. also stood fer Body Odor...
Now Sir...Missy Nicki is one enterprisin young woman who knows her way around a "Photo-Shop"... so she sat down to her trusty puter and when the smoke had cleared...voila....came up with this great design...... I love it!
She sent me the above humorous photygraff/logo... and not to be outdone...I asked myself...Cookie... what takes care of and eliminates body odor? I then e-mailed her with an idea I was having ...and she did the rest on her Photo-shop....
____________________________
posted by Cookie..... @ 9:13 PM
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