Wednesday, January 23, 2008

This is informative...and guarantee'd to anger ya... and some laff's fer y'all...

Well Sir...I know most of ya are purdy buzy with various things...but if'n ya got about 7 or 8 minutes...take a gander at this.....I first saw it over at Shooting The Messenger....


On a much lighter note.....

First year students at Iowa State Vet school were receiving their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow.

They all gathered around the surgery table with the carcass covered with a white sheet.

The professor started the class by telling them, "In Veterinary Medicine, it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor.

First is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body." For an example, the professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck it in his mouth.

"Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the anal opening of the dead cow and sucking on it.

When everyone finished, the professor looked at them and said, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger."

Now learn to pay attention. Life is tough, but it's even tougher if you're stupid.

Bill Clinton..."I have a Dream".....

Taken frum the New York Post...

ATM Procedures....

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note
that this Bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling
customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures
outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been

Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender


1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.


1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align
car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to
passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them
back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine
due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Reinsert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN
written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and reenter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place
cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place
receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Recheck makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and
place card into the slot
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting
behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.


This one is for everyone who...
a) has kids
b) had kids
c) was a kid
d) knows a kid
e) is going to have kids.

I guess that means all of us!!


I was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter
was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she

"Daddy, look at this" , and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said,

"Daddy's gonna eat your fingers," pretending to eat them.

I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter was standing
on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face.

I said, "What's wrong, honey?"

She replied,

"What happened to my booger?"

..and finally...The Big Question of the Day is...DOES THIS APPLY TO YOU??? (Sound On)