Sunday, March 23, 2008


Well my buddy Patrick, who sent this to me said..."Funny in any language"...


Has yur life turned inta a Country & Western song..... ???


The Seven Dwarfs go to the Vatican , and because they are 'the seven dwarfs' they get ushered in to see the Pope.

Dopey leads the pack.

'Dopey my son,' says the Pope, 'what can I do for you?'

Dopey asks, 'Excuse me, Your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome ?'

The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a
moment and answers, 'No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome .'

In the background a few of the dwarfs begin giggling.

Dopey turns around and gives them a glare, silencing them.

Dopey turns back to face the Pope.

'Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe ?'

The Pope, puzzled again, thinks for a moment and then answers, 'No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in all of Europe .'

This time all the other dwarfs burst into laughter

Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them all with an
angry glare.

Dopey turns back to the Pope and says, 'Mr. Pope, are there ANY dwarf nuns in the whole world?'

The Pope answers, 'I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world.'

The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling, and laughing,
pounding on the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks as they begin chanting:

'Dopey screwed a penguin!'
'Dopey screwed a penguin!'

Ahhh Yes...this is the way it was in "the good old days" when I first became a cop. Back then, ya could do shit like this and be justified.....


Yupper...The Original Happy Meal.....




Thanks fer that one Pat.....

No one believes seniors . . . Everyone thinks they are senile.

An Elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired.

Holding hands they walked back to their old school.
It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they'd shared, where Andy had carved 'I love you, Sally.'

On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet Sally quickly picked it up, but not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money--fifty-thousand dollars..

Andy said, 'We've got to give it back.'

Sally said, 'Finders keepers.' She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.

The next day, two FBI men were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knocked on the door.

'Pardon me, but did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armored car yesterday?'

Sally said, 'No.'

Andy said, 'She's lying. She hid it up in the attic.'

Sally said , 'Don't believe him, he's getting senile.'

The agents turn to Andy and began to question him.

One says: 'Tell us the story from the beginning'

Andy said, 'Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday . . '

The first FBI guy turns to his partner and says, 'We're outta here..'

...AND...since today is International Disturbed People's Day

I'm sending this encouraging message to all my disturbed friends out there (especially one "Courtesy/Civility Challenged Jarhead")...

I don't care if you lick windows,

take the special bus...

or occasionally pee on yourself...

You hang in there sunshine' guys are frigging special to me!


Little Suzy had a box of very small kittens that she was trying to give away, so she had them out on the street corner with a sign "FREE KITTENS" next to them. Suddenly a long line of big black cars came up with a policeman on a motorcycle in front. The cars all stopped and a tall black man stepped out from the biggest car. "Hi, little girl, what do you have there in the box?" he asked.

"Kittens" Little Suzy says. "They're so small, their eyes are not even open yet."

"What kind of kittens are they?" he asked. "Democrats" says Little

Suzy. The tall man smiled, returned to his car and they drove away.

Sensing a good photo opportunity, Sen. Obama called his campaign

manager and told him about the little girl with the kittens.

It was planned that they would return the next day, have all the media

there and tell everyone about these "democrat" kittens.

The next day, Little Suzy is standing out on the corner with her box

of kittens with the "FREE KITTENS" sign and the big motorcade of

black cars pulled up with all the vans and trucks from ABC, NBC, CBS and CNN.

Everyone had their cameras ready and then Sen. Obama got out

of his limo and walked up to Little Suzy. "Now don't be frightened,"

he said, I just want you to tell all these nice news people just what

kind of kittens you're giving away today."

"Yes sir," Suzy said, "they are all REPUBLICAN kittens."

Taken by surprise, Sen. Obama said, "But yesterday you told

me they were DEMOCRATS."

Little Suzy says, "Yes, I know. But today, they have their eyes open."

Over the past several days, I've used various photygraffs, video's, cartoons and articles forwarded to me by several of my regular contributors and On-Line Buddy's...

They are: Susan Gertson frum Eagle Lake, Texas. Missy Susan is excellent around a kitchen and has sent me many of her best recipe's over the years, which I have posted so that we all may enjoy her Epicurean delights. She's also an avid supporter of our Military as well as being a Gold Star Mom....and over time, Susan and her hubby Gayle have become a good friends of Cookie and his wife.....

"Charlie The Cop" is quite a character frum out Chicago way. He's a long retired Police Officer who has some real humorous stories to tell about the "old days" when thing weren't as "Politically Correct" as in todays world. He's also well known by several Chicago radio DJ's, and enjoys cooking as much as the Cookie duz....

Now...there's that ever cantankerous, grouchy old Gyrene who suffers from perpetual "Irritable Bowel Syndrome", "The Chief". He can be the most annoyin person y'all ever wanna meet...but ya cain't help lovin the guy cause he's such character and secretly has a heart as big as all outdoors (although he don't want ya t'know that). Ever now and agin the Chief will send sumthin to the Cookie via E-Mail, and then when I use it on the blog, he accuses me of "Stealin it"....can y'all believe sumthin....why I never...

...and of course we cain't be fergettin me good com padre Patrick. Patrick sends me good stuff all the time, and frum time to time on his blog, he likes to reminisce about his adventures and experiences back in Nam and snowbound Rome, NY (just up the road frum The Cookshack). I took an instant likin to Patrick because when I first met him and was perusin his blog, I saw a sign that says he takes great pleasure in annoyin the hell outta Liberals...Yupper...My kinda guy....

Recently, my good amiga MightyMom has been sendin the Cookie some real good stuff which I've been usin quite frequently. Her hubby is a retired "Submariner", which right off the bat qualifies him as he real great guy. Now Sir...MightyMom's blog is really more fer women-folk, however, every Thursday she has sumthin she calls "Thesaurus Thursday", and it's fun to play, so stop by frum time to time and make yur acquaintance with her....BTW...her and her hubby have a beautiful family....

Then there be "Fish" frum Kentucky. "Fish" used to have a blog of his own but because of persistant and regular problems with "Blogger", finally said to hell with it. I don't know that much about "Mr.Fish" other than the fact he's takin life easy and enjoyin his retirement..AND...that he sends me some excellent stuff all the time....

Now here's a guy I met fer the first time this past summer at my house (Above photygraff), his name is Clint Griffin. Clint is the Official Ship's Photographer fer the USS Midway docked in San Diego. Now Sir...Clint is an old Jarhead frum way back, but he looks more like an old Pirate cause he wears an eye patch over one eye. All he needs to complete the picture is a parrot perched on his shoulder. Now...there must sumthin about the Marine Corps cause Clint's on the cantankerous and irritable side like "The Chief", however, Clint not only sends me good cartoons, video's and joke, he also sends me current photygraff's of events happenin in San Diego and on the Midway....

I think both "The Chief" and Clint sorta just tolerate the Cookie cause I'm an old Seabee, and Marines and Seabee's almost always work together in theaters of fact we wear the same uniform.....

Now...some other folks I gotta say thanks to as well are "Cocoa" (a friend of The Chief's but I don't hold that against her), and CSSSCC frum Tampa. Both send me good things frum time t'time...

Now Sir...if'n I've left anyone out, and that's highly possible cause like they say, "the mind is the second thing to go", just leave a comment or an E-mail and do my penance in the next blogpost.....