Friday Follies....

Well now....first off, I'm gonna say a big ol Cookshack THANK YOU to "Chicago Charlie", Clint Griffin from the west coast, "Fish" frum down Kentucky way, and Susan Gertson frum Eagle Lake, Texas fer sendin in most of todays entertainment. Now Sir, I imagine that Missy Susan can surely relate to out first article....

YOU MIGHT BE A TEXAN IF:

1. You can properly pronounce Boerne, Nacogdoches, Waco, Amarillo, Waxahachie, Mexia, Sachse, Scyene and Bexar.

2. A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel cloud.

3. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on Christmas Day.

4. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.

5 Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.

6. You measure distance in minutes.

7. Someone you know has used the Dallas Cowboys Football schedule or a hunting schedule to plan their wedding date.

8. You have known someone who has had a belt buckle bigger than your fist.

9. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.

10. You know cowpies are not made of beef.

11. You actually understand this email, and you are "fixin' to" send it to your friends.

12. You learned how to shoot a gun before you learned how to multiply.

13. You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, bait, and pregnancy tests all in the same store.

14. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressing.

15. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol; a Chevy Silverado 4x4 is.

16..Finally, you are 100% Texan if you have ever been a part of this conversation:

"You wanna coke?" "Yeah." "What kind?"

"Dr. Pepper!".
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Well folks....my good amigo, Clint Griffin from out San Diego way sent me this here GREAT music video (about 7 minutes long), and I loved it so much, I immediately sent it to my close Marine Corps buddies, and now I'm postin it fer Y'all to watch and listen to. I'm sure that if yur a patriotic person, you'll enjoy it also, and it just might bring a tear to yur eye......

"The Bumper on my SUV."



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GI Insurance Salesman

Airman Jones was assigned to the induction centre, where he advised new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance.

It wasn't long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones was having a staggeringly high success-rate, selling insurance to nearly 100% of the recruits he advised.

Rather than asking him about this, the Captain stood at the back of the room and listened to Jones' sales pitch.

Jones explained the basics of GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said, "If you are killed in a battle and have a GI Insurance, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. But, if you don't have a GI insurance and get killed in the battle, the government only has to pay a maximum of $6000."

"Now," he concluded, "which group do YOU think they are going to send into battle first?"
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...ADULT CONTENT!!!


Never, Never, Never,

EVER ..

And I repeat

EVER

Tell A Woman

She Can't Cook !!!



Now Sir...this is a real "JOHNSONville Brat"....


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Well Sir...having recently lost the Swimming competition to the Americans, who they announced they were going "to smash", the Fwench have started practicing thier Ice Skating routine's extensively, gettin ready fer the Winter Olympics.....


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