A short quickie.... and an answer to an unwarranted request!

Riddles

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Q. What's a mixed feeling?

A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

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Q What's the height of conceit?

A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

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Q. What's the definition of macho?

A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

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Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

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Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?

A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

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Q.Why is divorce so expensive?

A. Because it's worth it!

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Q. What is a Yankee?

A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

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Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?

A. They both like a tight seal.

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Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.

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Q.What is the difference between 'ooooooh'and 'aaaaaaah'?

A. About three inches.

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Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?

A. The grip.

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Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?

A. It's not hard.

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Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

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Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

A: 45 pounds.

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Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?

A: 45 minutes.

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Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?

A: Breasts don't have eyes.

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Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?

A. The swallow.

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Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?

A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.
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Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?

A. They don't have balls to scratch!
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OH, don't groan. You know darn well you're going to copy and send this on to somebody.

Live well, laugh hard, & love deeply!!!

Thanks to "Chicago Charlie" fer sendin these riddles along!
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Now Sir....this is a personal message to a "lurker" out there ( I won't mention her name) who likes to passive-aggressively attack old Cookie and his wife by impugning our reputations and causing problems with her lies and innuendo whenever she feels like it. Here's the answer to yur request amiga....














Cookie apologizes to everyone other than the intended recipient (she's knows who she is) if'n this has offended Y'all....

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