Two new Navy Ship's..The USS Reagan, the USS Clinton..and the Marines get shit on...

Subject: Fw: TWO NEW NAVY SHIPS

USS REAGAN



Seeing it next to the Arizona Memorial really puts its size into perspective...................ENORMOUS and BEAUTIFUL!

When the Bridge pipes "Man the Rail" there is a lot of rail to man on this monster: shoulder to shoulder, around 4.5 acres. Her displacement is about 100,000 tons with full complement.

Capability:

Top speed exceeds 30 knots, powered by two nuclear reactors that can operate for more than 20 years without refueling

1. Expected to operate in the fleet for about 50 years

2. Carries over 80 combat aircraft

3. Three arresting cables can stop a 28-ton aircraft going 150 miles per hour in less than 400 feet.

Size:

1. Towers 20 stories above the waterline

2. 1092 feet long; nearly as long as the Empir e State Building is tall

3. Flight deck covers 4.5 acres

4. 4 bronze propellers, each 21 feet across, weighing 66,200 pounds

5. 2 rudders, each 29 by 22 feet and weigh ing 50 tons

6. 4 high speed aircraft elevators, each over 4,000 square feet

Capacity:

1. Home to about 6,000 Navy personnel

2. Carries enough food and supplies to operate for 90 days

3. 18,150 meals served daily

4. Distillation plants provide 400,000 gallons of fresh water from sea water daily, enough for 2000 homes

5. Nearly 30,000 light fixtures and 1,325 miles of cable and wiring 1,400 telephones

6. 14,000 pillowcases and 28,000 sheets

7. Costs the Navy approximately $250,000 per day for pier side operation

8. Costs the Navy approximately $25 million per day for underway operations (Sailor's salaries included).


US Navy welcomes the USS William Jefferson Clinton




Sunday July 2nd, 2007,

Vancouver, BC, Headed for Seattle, WA.,

The US Navy welcomed the latest member of its fleet today. The USS William Jefferson Clinton (CVS1) set sail today from its home port of Vancouver, BC.

The ship is the first of its kind in the Navy and is a standing legacy to President "Slick Willy" Clinton "for his foresight in military budget cuts" and his conduct while president. The ship is constructed nearly entirely from recycled aluminum, and old cigars, and is completely solar powered with a top speed of 5 knots.

It boasts an arsenal comprised of one (unarmed) F14 Tomcat or one (unarmed) F18 Hornet aircraft which although they cannot be launched or captured on the 100 foot flight deck, form a very menacing presence.

As a standing order there are no firearms allowed on board.

The 20 person crew is completely diversified, including members of all races, creeds, sex, and sexual orientation. They affectionately call their ship "Old BJ".

This crew, like the crew aboard the USS Jimmy Carter, is specially trained to avoid conflicts and appease any and all enemies of the United States at all costs.!

An onboard Type One DNC Universal Translator can send out messages of apology in any language to anyone who may find America offensive. The number of apologies are limitless and though some may sound hollow and disingenuous, the Navy advises all apologies will sound very sincere.

The ship's purpose is not defined so much as a unit of national defense, but instead in times of conflict, the USS Clinton has orders to seek refuge in Canada.
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The Jayne Carroll Show is a political talk radio program that airs daily in the Portland, Oregon, metropolitan area...

Carroll asked her audience to come up with an official name for the Clinton $1.7 million house in Chappaqua, New York

Carroll's call-in contest required the names to be in relative good taste, to be original, and to capture the essence of one or both of the Clintons .

The response was overwhelming! Some names nominated for the Clinton 's new home included:

Perjurers' Palace
HillBilly Villa
The House of Bill's Repute
Drawers Downs
Cheatem Estates
Sin Simeon
The Knee Pad
The White Trash House
The Blight House
The Panderosa
Liars' Lair
Bill & Hill's Bribe & Breakfast
The Clinton Compost
Dogpatch on the Hudson
The Hen House
The Out House
The Love Shack
The House of Seven Felonies
Motel Sex

But the clear, hands-down winner was--

DISGRACELAND
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AND....fer those of ya that enjoyed my Submarine "Shit" story...get yurselves on over to my shipmate's blog... Myrons Random Thoughts and read about a great "crapper" story and some payback to "The Marine's".... it's the 2nd post down...ya cain't miss it.... BUT...make sure y'all come straight back here cause there be some more real good stuff ahead...

Pay Attention Chief and "fits".....
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...AND...yet anuther real great OBG site (with plenty of great links) fer y'all to enjoy. Again...just Clicky de Linky...and Turn Up yur Sound....

http://www.thestatenislandboys.com/U_thrill_me/