Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Wednesday Wanks....


BTW...the bearded guy looked alot like Cookie...Hmmm.....

Hmmm....maybe this bathin suit shoulda come with instructions....


Partial Nudity Ahead!!

Sorry...couldn't resist postin this next photygraff....



** Sigh**...story of my life....

Two guys are drinking in a bar.

One says, 'Did you know that a moose has sex
10 to 15 times a night?'

'Ah crap,' says his friend, 'and I just joined the

From a Blondes Diary

Dear Diary

You remember last year I replaced all the windows in the house with those expensive double pane energy-efficient kind Well, this week I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.

Now just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid.

So, I told him just what his fast talking Sales guy had told me last year ....

Namely, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves!

Helllooooo? It's been a year! There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up. He didn't call back. Bet he felt dumb!

My good buddy Patrick sent me a copy of a letter he received from his friends wife. He tells me that his friend is recovering slowly...very slowly. Thanks Pat...


Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small.

Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.

'If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds'.

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. 'How long will this take?' I asked.

'They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband replies.

I stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?'

Without missing a beat he says, 'Worked for your butt, didn't it?'

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw.

Stupid, stupid man

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Fer some of y' be a wake up call....

Now Sir, I know that most of my readers come over to The Shack to take a break from all the political bullshit and scary world events by gettin a little humor and maybe a laugh or two, but sometimes, Cookie feels a very strong urge to edjukate and enlighten certain folks regardin points of interest that they may not be aware of.

Now, just in case y'all think that all the various jihadi terrorist training camps are all located in Afghanistan, Iran, the mountains of Pakistan, or some other such ungodly this. It's short, and indeed very enlightening....

Howdy naybor, how Y'all doin this here fine day???

Remember this quote, it may someday save your life, or someone in your family.

"Act like you are his friend, and then kill him, just like in the book."

Tuesday Tidbits.... write the caption fer this one.....


...and, along similar lines.....

"A group of very concerned folks recently attended a "Global Warming" conference in...."


Hmmm....can Y'all pick out the blonde dancer??



Now be a Cell Phone by Nokia that has the potential to really blow yur mind....


Well Y'all know, Firefightin can be a very dangerous and deadly occupation, however, frum time t'time, there are a few positive aspects fer the firemen....

Monday, February 09, 2009

Monday mini's....and "TURNIPS"

Listen to the Disclaimer in this commercial.....


...and "The Chief" sends me this humorous story bout sumthin that recently occurred at his home....

One evening, "The Chief", thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!'

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the Chief took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. 'What the Hell is this?' he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.

"Honey", he hollered into the bathroom, 'Why did you put Talcum Powder in my underwear?'

She replied, 'It's not talcum powder; it's Miracle Grow'


Students at a local school were assigned to read 2 books, 'Titanic' and 'My Life' by Bill Clinton.

One student turned in the following book report,
With the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!

His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report.

Titanic:.... Cost - $29.99
Clinton :..... Cost - $29.99

Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read
Clinton :... Over 3 hours to read

Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton :... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic:.... Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton :...... Bill is a bullshit artist.

Titanic:.... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton :.... Ditto for Bill.

Titanic:..... During the ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton :..... Ditto for Monica.

Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton :... Let's not go there.

Titanic:..... Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton :.... Monica' s forced to return her gifts.

Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton :..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton :..... Monica.. ooh, let's not go there, either.

Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton :..... Bill goes home to Hillary - basically the same thing

Good Snake...Good Boy!



....and man, can I relate t'this. Turnips....YUK!! And wouldn't ya know it, me Irish wife loves em.....DAMN!!!

Sunday, February 08, 2009

I believe this is where we may be headed if we don't wake up...

My good friend and brother in arms, "Charlie the Cop" sent me this today, and after watching it, it brought back lessons I, and many of you had learned many years back, but had long since forgotten.

THIS IS AN EXCELLENT VIDEO! and I urge you to spend 10 minutes or so to watch it, because it most certainly points out where we are headed unless we wake up quickly. It is not a "scare video", it simply points out and educates us to what has happened in the past, and appears to be happening right now in America.

I implore you, if you take the short time to watch and digest this fine piece of material, please re-post it on your own blogs so that we may educate, and re-educate our neighbors and fellow Americans.