Saturday, March 08, 2008

Sunday Laugh-In.....


More Pics @ MySpaceAntics.com


Well Sir...I s'pose there be a few of y'all out there who might just remember one of the best comical shows ever.....Rowan & Martin's LAUGH IN....

Ah yes....time's where a simpler back then...but, I guess so were we....Here be some clips and snippets...


















______________________________

The husband leans over and asks his wife,

'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago?? We went behind this very tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.'

'Yes', she says, 'I remember it well.'

'OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?'

'Oh Charlie, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!'

A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them.

The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence. The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.

After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing. I've got to ask them what their secret is.

So, as the couple passes, he says to them,' Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?'

Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,

'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence.'
_________________________________

When Grandma Goes To Court

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma
a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked,

'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'

She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the
room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.
He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one
of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with
three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and,
in a very quiet voice, said,

'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both
to the electric chair.

_______________________________

HAT TIP: My old buddy frum Chi-Town..."Charlie the Cop"...


Thursday, March 06, 2008

Saturday Sundries... and sumthin totally NEW...

Now Sir...I posted these about 6 months ago...but a few folks E-mailed me about them... so... here be some ad's frum Yester-year, and ...what makes them humorous is cause they're real...

** Click the Ad to Enlarge ** if'n yur eye's ain't what they used to be...
















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Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself nude in a mirror, after a relaxing bath.

Her frustration over her lack of ability to lose weight was depressing her.

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help...

"God...if you take away my love handles, I'll devote my life to you," she prayed.

And at that very moment, her ears fell off...........
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Two families moved from Saudi Arabia to the USA .

When they arrived the two fathers made a bet - in a year's time which ever family had become more American would win.

A year later they met again. The first man said,

"My son is playing baseball, I had McDonald's for breakfast and I'm on my way to pick up a case of Bud. How about you?"

The second man replied, "Fuck you, towel head."
__________________________________

My wife and I went to the rodeo and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said, '

"THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR"

My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ....Smiled and said,

"He mated 50 times last year."

We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,

"THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR"

My wife gave me a healthy jab and said,

"WOW~~That's more than twice a week! .........You could learn a lot from him."

We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,

"THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR"

My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,

"That's once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one."

I looked at her and said,

"Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow."

Honestly-----My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.
________________________________

Well Sir...movin on...my good amiga Nicki from over at The Birthplace of the Process of Illogical Logic wrote a post about how Barack Hussein Obama may be having troubles because of his middle name...so..she felt that all he has to do is just use his initials...B O. Then it occurred to her that B.O. also stood fer Body Odor...

Now Sir...Missy Nicki is one enterprisin young woman who knows her way around a "Photo-Shop"... so she sat down to her trusty puter and when the smoke had cleared...voila....came up with this great design...... I love it!



She sent me the above humorous photygraff/logo... and not to be outdone...I asked myself...Cookie... what takes care of and eliminates body odor? I then e-mailed her with an idea I was having ...and she did the rest on her Photo-shop....


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Fractured Friday Funnies...

Well Maam....Y'all just gonna love this one...unless ya love Obama.....

The Obama Man Can.... Funny....




A Big Old Cookshack HAT TIP to Myron frum Myron's Random Thoughts fer that great video...
___________________________________

Well Sir...lets continue with some funnies that MightyMom sent over frum My Wonderful Life....








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Subject: You might be a Taliban if....

10. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

9. You own a $300 machine gun and a $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

8. You have more wives than teeth.

7. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared Jihad against.

5 . You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry ammunition in your robe.

4. You've never been asked, "Does this burka make my ass look big?"

3. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

2. A common compliment is, "I love what you've done with your cave."

And, the NUMBER ONE SIGN you might be a member of the Taliban:

1. You wipe your ass with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
__________________________________

Now Sir...here be what happens when a Redneck wins the lottery and builds himself a mansion with an outdoor hot tub......




_____________________________________

Sometimes...Camera placement really tells the truth....


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Subject: Guts vs Balls

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really
know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed,
the definition for each is listed below..

Guts - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met
by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: 'Are you still
cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'

Balls - is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of
perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the
butt and having the balls to say: 'OK...You're next.'

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions.

Medically speaking, there is no difference in that the prognosis of both
actions will ultimately result in death.
____________________________________

Well Sir...next...we got a shameful photygraff of a little "Muslim Pussy", followed by Roger Clemens dog....

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...and finally....here be a real great Screen Cleaner fer y'all.....

https://emp.ucsd.edu/swf/screenclean.swf
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...and some more HAT TIPs to: "Charlie the Chi-Town Cop", Clint Griffin frum out San Diego way, and "Fish" frum down home Kentucky....
__________________

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

"Y'all knew they were comin....."

Well Sir...as me good buddy Patrick said to me as he sent me some of these jokes..."Y'all knew they were coming."...

Only the Irish have Jokes Like These

Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy,
Looking like he'd just been run over by a train.

His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken,
His face is cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp

" What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.

" J amie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy.

"That little shit, O'Conner," says Sean,

"He couldn't do that to you,

He must have had something in his hand."

" That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had,
And a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."

"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself,
Didn't you have something in your hand?"

That I did," said Paddy.

"Mrs. O'Conner's breast, and a thing of
Beauty it was, but useless in a fight."

******************************

An Irishman who had a little too much to drink
Is driving home from the city one night and,
Of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road.

A cop pulls him over.

" So," says the cop to the driver,
Where have ya been?"

"Why, I've been to the pub of course,"
Slurs the drunk.

"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite
A few to drink this evening."

"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.

"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and
Folding his arms across his chest,
"that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk.
"For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."

**********************************

Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual,
When Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.

"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya".

"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"

"That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda."

There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."

"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me."

"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."

Finally, she looked up at Tim.
"How did it happen, Tim?"

"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat
Of Guinness Stout and drowned."

"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me truth, Tim..Did he at least go quickly?"

"Well, Brenda... No. In fact, He got out three times to pee."

************************************

Mary Clancy goes up to Father O' Grady after His Sunday morning service, and she's in tears.

He says, " So what's bothering you, Mary my dear?"

She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news My husband passed away last night."

The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?"

She says, "That he did, Father."

The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary? "

She says, He said, 'Please Mary, put down that damn gun...'

*******************************

A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth, sits down, but says nothing.
The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the drunk continues to sit there.

Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall

The drunk mumbles, "ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either!"
________________________________

...and here be a fine Irish joke I've been a tellin fer years....

Colleen was a fine attractive Irish lass, and at age 16...she marries Patrick. She has 4 kids by Patrick, but alas, Patrick catches the Flu one winter and passes on.

Now Sir...Colleen, being as attractive as she is, quickly gets re-married to Shamus. She has another 4 kids by Shamus, but, Shamus was a member of the IRA and while making a bomb one day, accidentally blew himself up.

Now mates...although Colleen now has 8 children, she was still relatively young and attractive and again marries, only this time to Sean. She then has another 4 kids by Sean.

Now friends...with Sean havting to support himself, a wife and 12 children and his farm, he worked so hard, he worked himself to death.

A few years later, Colleen herself passes on.

At her funeral, her stout Irish mother who is still alive, is standing at the side of Colleen's coffin with her friend, looking in at Colleeen.

"Well" said the mother, "Thanks be t'God they're finally t'gether."

The friend, not knowin which husband the mother might be talking about, ask's.."Who might ye be talkin aboot darlin...Patrick, Shamus or Sean?"

"No darlin" replies Colleens mother, "I was talkin about her legs!"
_________________________________

Now Sir...I know this next article is political in nature and I said I was going to stay away from this stuff...BUT... This IS a Joke...and....He IS a JOKE!


A PAID POLITICAL ANNOUNCEMENT BY SEN. BARACK OBAMA (D- ILL)

My fellow Identity-Americans.

As your future President I want to thank my supporters, for their... well, support.

Your mindless support of me, despite my complete lack of any legislative achievement, my pastor's relations with Louis Farrakhan and Libyan dictator Moamar Quadafi, or my blatantly leftist voting record while I present myself as some sort of bi-partisan agent of change.

I also like how my supporters claim my youthful drug use and criminal behavior somehow qualifies me for the Presidency after 8 years of claiming Bush's youthful drinking disqualifies him. Your hypocrisy is a beacon of hope shining over a sea of political posing.

I would also like to thank the Kennedy's for coming out in support of me. There's a lot of glamour behind the Kennedy name, even though JFK started the Vietnam War, his brother Robert illegally wiretapped Martin Luther King, Jr. and Teddy (currently the Senate drunk) caused the death of a young staff member by drowning. And I'm not going anywhere near the cousins, both literally and figuratively.

And I'd like to thank Oprah Winfrey for her support. Her love of meaningless empty platitudes will be the force that propels me to the White House.

Americans should vote for me, not because of my lack of experience or achievement, but because I make people feel good. Voting for me causes some white folk to feel relieved of their imagined, racist guilt.

I say things that sound meaningful, but don't really mean anything because Americans are tired of things having meaning. If things have meaning, then that means you have to think about them.

Americans are tired of thinking.

It's time to shut down the brain, and open up the heart.

So when you go to vote, remember don't think, just do.

And do it for me.

Thank You.

HAT TIP: Susan Gertson fer sharin this with us.....
_________________________________

Now Sir...we'll leave you t'day with a song I've always enjoyed very much, especially when ya got a special young woman in yur arms while yur dancin in a darkened room...BUT... since I began this post with a Patrick...I'll end it with anothet Patrick...Patrick Swayze. This one goes out to Gina Elise who is working hard and doing wonders for our wounded war Vets....and, from watchin her latest video on YouTube, I happen to know that this is her favorite song......my way of sayin ....Thanks "G"....




COOKIE'S NOTE: I had posted this a few hours prior to learning of Mr. Swayze's present grave medical condition. I think this is also a fitting tribute to him as this is one of the movies he is best remembered for.
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Monday, March 03, 2008

Oh No!!! Invaders from Mars... and other such places...BUT... Not Mexico...

Well Sir...here was a time when fer the outrageous cost of .25 cents, ya could get inta the movies on a Saturday afternoon, watch one or two of these "B" movies, and grab some popcorn or candy fer yurself as well...AND...these were the ONLY invaders ya had t'worry about back then...

BTW...if'n ya recall...ya could always tell when you were gonna have the shit scared outta ya by the increased crescendo of the music.....













...and Men...this one will scare the livin B'Jesus outta ya.....



BUT...we'll end with one of McDonalds best Commercials.....

Good on ya Missy "G".....

Well Sir...as one of my women-folk readers once described this young woman's efforts to help our wounded Vet's ..."She's usin her goods fer the good"...

...and....like I promised yesterday....only good or humorous things at the Cookshack frum here on out....and Gina Elise is GOOD!!




Well Sir...this here Vet had to spend some time in a VA Hospital some time back, and although the care I and others received was excellent...any hospital can be a very lonely place....Sooo...if yur a Vet, disabled or not, and ya've ever spent any length of time in any hospital...then ya can just imagine what a visit frum a fine lookin patriotic young woman like Gina could do fer yur morale...I know she'd lift my "spirits" a tad....so...if'n ya can...

Spend a couple a bucks and buy one of her calendars, have yur photygraff taken with the calendar and send it in to Gina, who will most likely use it on her website.....OR...buy one that will be sent to a hospitalized Vet....even better...
_______________________________

RETIREMENT BONUS

The Navy found they had too many Chief Petty Officers and decided to offer an early
retirement bonus. They promised any Chief Petty Officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The Chief's got to choose what those two points would be.

The first Chief who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of
his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked
out with a bonus of $72,000.

The second Chief who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be
measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out
with $96,000.

The third one was an old Navy Seabee, Senior Chief Petty Officer, a grizzly old Chief who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, "From the tip of my
weenie to my testicles."

It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider,
explaining about the nice big checks the previous two Chiefs had
received. But the crusty old Senior Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a Medical Officer.

The Medical Officer arrived and instructed the Chief to "drop 'em," which
he did.. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the
Chief's weenie and began to work back. Dear Lord!" he suddenly exclaimed,
"Where are your testicles?"

The old Chief calmly replied, "Vietnam."

Hat Tip: Missy Susan from Eagle Lake, Mexas...er...Texas....
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The Democratic Party has a crisis of monumental proportions:

They don't know whether to vote for the "Nut" with two Boobs or the "Boob" with two Nuts....

Hat Tip: Myron from Myrons Random Thoughts....
____________________________

A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, "Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot?"

The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot."

"Holy crap," the guy replies. "You actually understood and answered me!"

"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a highly intelligent thoroughly educated bird."

"Oh yeah?" the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?"

"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers."

"Wow," says the guy. "You really can understand and speak English can't you?"

"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion."

The guy looks at the $20000 price tag. "Sorry, but I just can't afford that."

"Pssssssst," says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just make the guy an offer!"

The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.

Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.

One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes, "Psssssssssssst," and motions him over with one wing. "I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman."

"What are you talking about?" asks the guy..

"When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at the door in a sheer black nightie."

"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. "THEN what happened?"

"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie and began petting her all over," reported the parrot.

"NO!" he exclaims. "And she let him?"

"Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie! , got down on his knees and began to kiss her all over...."

Then the frantic guy demands, "THEN WHAT HAPPENED?"

"Damned if I know. It was about that time that I got an erection and and fell off my perch!"

Hat Tip: "Charlie the Cop"......
____________________________________

Now Sir....here be some pictures of some of the medals I either received while in the Navy, or was eligible fer.... ** Click To Enlarge**

BTW...I'm pretty sure that "The Chief" frum over at Smolderin Embers got some of these ribbons and medals whist he was a Gyrene.....



Hat Tip: Clint Griffin frum San Diego......
____________________________________

How many of y'all watched this one at a Saturday afternoon Matinee' at yur local "Sit & Scratch"...??



__________________________________

Now Sir...my west coast buddy Patrick from Born Again Redneck done "tagged" me to publish an "Old Time" recipe' that no modern health conscious person in their right mind would eat today....

So...here be a good old southern recipe' that I'll bet most of y'all ain't never even heard of...let alone eaten.....

Slum-Gullion

Now…I ain’t gonna really be a givin y’all any amounts cause its all gonna depend on who…and how many yur a gonna be servin…

Cook up some Macaroni…Elbow or Egg-noodle…it really don’t make no never-mind….

If’n ya got one…use a deep Cast Iron Dutch Oven fer the next part….if not…use a regular pot.

Usin a couple a tablespoons of Vegetable oil…lightly brown up a big amount of minced onion and minced Garlic (I like lots a Garlic).

When nicely golden brown…add a goodly amount of Hamburger and cook until no pink is showin. Remove all contents frum the pot with a slotted spoon. Drain off all the Hamburger grease.

Now…if’n ya like…cook up a bunch a chopped bacon in the same pot/oven. I like to use the bacon but that’s optional.

Now add a bunch of chopped green peppers, I large can of Diced Tomato’s, all the cooked hamburger/onion/garlic and the cooked noodles, and simmer fer an hour or so…..

Just afore yur ready t’serve…add 1 cup of Sour Cream if’n ya like…and simmer fer a few minutes more till all is hot….

Serve with some real good Sour Dough or Garlic Bread…..Enjoy…..


Now Sir....I also gotta tag 2 other folks who like to cook a might, and may have some "old time" recipe or nuther just collectin dust....Sooo....I'll tag:

Nicki from The Birthplace of the Process of Illogical Logic....

...and last..but not least... "Bothenook" from A Geezer's Corner.....


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Sunday, March 02, 2008

Monday...a promise frum Cookie... and some great Movie Memorabilia..

OK folks....as of late...Cookie has been receivin comments..AND personal E-mails from folks who regularly come over to The Cookshack to basically take a break from Politics and all the shit goin on in this insane world today... A chance to get a laff or two and ferget all the bullshit goin on these gawd awfull political campaigns and world news that either piss's ya off, or scares the shit outta ya....Soo...

Although, every now and agin, somethin or someone really piss's me off so bad that the Cookie goes on a rant for a spell (usually sumthin to do with the Obamanable Showman, the Hildebeast or those assholes in Berkely)...sooo ...I'm gonna do everythin in my power from here on out to give y'all a sanctuary from the insanity of everythin that's goin on in the world today.....so lets begin....

Well Sir...every Village has at least one.....




Hat Tip: "Charlie the Cop" frum out Chicago way....
_______________________________

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
**************************

In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
**************************
On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon :
Yesterday's Meals on Wheels
**************************

On another Septic Tank Truck:
"We're #1 in the #2 business"
**************************

At a Proctologist's door:
"To expedite your visit please back in."
**************************

On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
**************************

On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
**************************

On a Church's Billboard:
"7 days without God makes one weak."
**************************

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
"Invite us to your next blowout."
**************************

On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"
**************************

At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
**************************

On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
**************************

In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
**************************
On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."
**************************
At an Optometrist's Office :
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
**************************

On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."
**************************

On a Fence:
"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!"
**************************

At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
**************************

Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
**************************

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
**************************

At the Electric Company :
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be."
**************************

In a Restaurant window :
"Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."
**************************

In the front yard of a Funeral Home :
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
**************************
At a Propane Filling Station ,
"Thank heaven for little grills."
**************************

And don't forget the sign at a
Chicago Radiator Shop:
"Best place in town to take a leak."
______________________________

Warning - not just for New Yorkers, but anybody planning on a visit!!!!

Zero tolerance speed camera

With the New York highway death toll continuing to increase, this will be the first year that Zero Tolerance Speed Cameras will be used. The new cameras look different from the normal cameras. I have included a photo so that you are familiar with them. Make sure you do not speed when approaching one!!

Please take this warning seriously as you will not get a second chance.



Gotta thank Clint Griffin frum San Diego Mexifornia fer that one....
________________________________

When Bill and Hillary first got married Bill said, 'I am putting a box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it.'

In all their 30 years of marriage, Hillary never looked. On the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box was 3 empty beer cans and $81,874.25 in cash.

She closed the box and put it back under the bed. Now that she knew what was in the box, she was doubly curious as to why there even was such a box with such contents. That evening, they were out for a special anniversary dinner.

After dinner, Hillary could no longer contain her curiosity and she confessed, saying, 'I am so sorry, Bill. For all these years, I kept my promise and never looked into the box under our bed. However, today the temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know, why do you keep the 3 beer cans in the box?'

Bill thought for a while and said, 'I guess after all these years you deserve to know the truth. Whenever I was unfaithful to you, I put an empty beer can in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it again.'

Hillary was shocked, but said, 'Hmmm, Jennifer, Paula and Monica. I am very disappointed and saddened by your behavior. However, since you are addicted to sex I guess it does happen and I guess 3 times is not that bad considering your problem.'

Bill thanked her for being so understanding. They hugged and made their peace. A little while later Hillary asked Bill, 'So why do you have all that money in the box?'

Bill answered: 'Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans, I took them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash.'
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...and here be a little sumthin dedicated both C.D.Jewell and Pat Houseworth who I know appreciate these.....

Movie Memorabilia.... Those Great 1950's Sci-Fi flicks....I'd rather have these guys invading us than Obama....




Ah Yes....James Arness's first starring roll.... "The Thing"