Friday, March 21, 2008

Easter Sunday.. "Sunday Mornin Comin Down"...a personal resurrection..

Well Sir....there just might be one or two of ya out there who've been where this great Johnny Cash song talks about and can relate to it...I know I have. The first time I ever heard Johnny Cash sing this song, I remember thinkin that whoever wrote it (Chris Kristofferson) has been there, because it was like someone had looked into my heart and captured all the lonely, sad and painful feelings of a Sunday morning of mine along time back....

.....an Easter Sunday mornin where everything in this song came crashin in on me...and I guess that in the 20/20 vision of hindsight, it was actually a very good thing, because it stirred me to take some personal responsibility and take charge of certain area's of my life... sorta like my own personal resurrection....

So now...on Easter Sunday mornin's...I like to briefly reminisce, but not linger, back to that painful, forlorn day so long ago to remind myself just where I came from.....



If you've never been there...thank your Higher Power, or luck, or fate, whichever you prefer, but for the fact that at this very moment you've got this computer, and the luxury to view this video in the warmth and comfort of your home, and hopefully that should stir some feelings of gratitude and thankfulness in your heart.....

Have a wonderful Easter Sunday everyone......

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Saturday Sundries.....

Well Sir....does this Election remind y'all of anything?....


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...and...we just gotta have some Saturday mornin cartoons.....



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Well Sir...my good amiga Susan Gertson sent me this funny "Lone Ranger" story frum a show I wouldn't watch if'n it was the last TV show on the tube...the David Letterman Show....




...and fer those of you who might be askin yurselves..."WhoTF is The Lone Ranger?"...here's who he is.....




Cookies Note: When I was growin up in that late 40's, our family was the first family on our block to have a TV set, and, throughout the day there were NO TV shows on at all until 7:00PM at night, at which time "The Lone Ranger" came on. The rest of the day was all a "Test Pattern" (how many of y'all remember those?).

During those days, just about every kid in the neighborhood (and beyond) showed up at my house at around 6:45 or so to get a good seat fer the show.....

Oh Ya...and Mom would usually make a huge batch of real good "Home Made" Popcorn with tons of real butter on it..... you know, the type where you poured some oil and pop corn into a pan and had to continually shake the pan over the heat until it all popped.....


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....and here be a great reason why y'all should NEVER Ice Fish in Alaska....



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I've posted these afore but regardless, they're always good fer a laugh.....

Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great!

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole?

Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....

FIRST TESTIMONY:

I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly,

"How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?"

I turned around and walked back out and never went back.

My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using.

After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.

He asked if he could help me.

Without thinking, I looked at him and said,

"I think I like playing with men's balls"

THIRD TESTIMONY:

My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts.

As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.

I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."

My sister started to laugh hysterically.

The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away.
To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:

While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok.

I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.

I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.

To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,

"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"

The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange.

Even the tellers stopped what they were doing.

I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.

The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly.

One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands It was very busy, with a full dining room.

While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.

The realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No".

I kept thinking "Oh Lord, th at child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."

Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
"No," he replied.

I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny did you have an accident ? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"

While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.

An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY: This is the best one....

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks.

What happens when you predict snow but don't get any!

We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:

"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?"

Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
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....Awwwwwe...What a Sweet Little Girl.......




Thanks "Fish" fer sendin that along.....
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I posted alot of comedy today because tomorrow, Easter Sunday, holds a very special meanin fer the Cookie man....I hope y'all stop by The Cookshack and hear a story of mine...

Fergetfull Friday... and...In case ya was wonderin.. Here's what a "Mac-Daddy" is...

When ya didn't do the laundry...and ya need a tank top...here's a Redneck idear fer ya...




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My New Home Security

I hired a guard that patrols the area for door to door salespeople, certain religious groups, and beggars. I'm sending you a picture of her so you will know her when you come to visit. Click on the guard below.

Guard
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Subject: Montana Golf Rules

The Montana State Department of Fish and Wildlife advises golfers to
take extra precautions and be on the alert for Bears while playing on
Gallatin , Helena, and Lewis and Clark National Forests Golf Courses.

They advise golfers to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells
on their clothing to alert, but not to startle the Bears unexpectedly.
They also advise you to carry pepper spray in the case of an encounter
with a Bear.

It is also a good idea to watch for signs of bear activity. Golfers
should be able to 'recognize the difference' between Black bear and
Grizzly bear droppings on the golf course.

Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berries and possibly
squirrel fur.

Grizzly bear droppings have bells, golf-gloves and sunglasses in them,
and smell like pepper spray.
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A married couple in their early 60's was celebrating their 35th wedding
anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table saying,

"For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to
each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish."

Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.

The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! two tickets for the Queen
Mary II appeared in her hands.

The husband thought for a moment: "Well, this is all very romantic, but
an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but
my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me."

The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.

So the fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! the husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story:

Men who are ungrateful bastards should remember fairies are female.
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...and...along that same line of thought....

Use caution if'n yur Financial Advisor is a woman....




Thanks Missy Susan fer sendin that along.....
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The newest model in BMW Airbag Safety...

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Brief Nudity Ahead....









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"Obama is a Mac-Daddy"....who knew?

AND...Here be a Church Y'all ain't never gonna see Obama in...... this Pastor don't mince any wurds when it comes to Obama and what he thinks of him (Which ain't much)....

Y'all just gotta watch this one....




Cookies Note: Patrick from PRH...a day in the life, just notified me that the Obama crew has had this video removed frum YouTube just like they had "Pastor" Wrights video removed....Sorry folks...but when it comes to anything truthful about this fraud Obama, other than bullshit praise about the coming of the new Messiah....Obama's folks are getting rid of all the evidence......


This in itself aughta tell y'all sumthin.....
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I realize that I probably used some photygraffs and articles that were sent to me, and...having been a hurry to prepare this post as I must be at the VA Hospital fer some testin...probably furgot to give credit where credit is due...If so...y'all have my deepest apologies. I'll make it up to ya next time....

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Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Thursday Tid-Bits...

Well Sir....my buddy the Chief frum over at Smolderin Embers in a Mohawk Campfire sent me this here cartoon as he knows how I tends t'feel bout Democrats....

**CLICK TO ENLARGE if'n yur eyesights failin ya....**


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Well Sir...I been awaitin fer this cause I new it would eventually happen....



Just for the fun of it..."Google" Barack Obama and "The Antichrist" and see what happens. I had to laugh at the number of websites out there dedicated to the fact that "Obama" is the Anti-Christ.

Now lets see...can you name any important or noteworthy world figure who, at some time or anuther throughout history...HASN'T been named the Antichrist...?

Now Sir...as y'all know, I'm definitely NO fan of Obama-lama-ding-dong, but ..."The Anti-Christ"?...

Well...I guess this one is up to y'all to make yur own decisions on....
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Well Sir...here be a movie the Cookie definitely plans to see... Ben Stein's "Expelled". Take about 7 minutes of yur time and watch this trailer...

...that is if'n ya believe in a "Higher Power". I think some of y'all will find this very interestin. It's coming this Spring.....



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OR...maybe Gene McDaniels had the answer back in 1961....



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...and then there's the big shootout we had here in my hometown, Bridgeport, NY a century or so ago....



We actually did have a real bad-ass gang in the mid to late 1800's called "the Loomis Gang" (Google them) who scared the B'Jesus outta everyone, stealin horses, robbing folks and banks, and yes...even trains....

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Wednesday....

...and Susan Gertson and Ben Stein reminds us who the REAL Stars are.....


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This is a hoot, but I suspect the minister didn't appreciate it.

A minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great emphasis he said,

"If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river."

With even greater emphasis he said, "And if I had All the wine in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river."

And then finally, shaking his fist in the air, he Said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river."

Sermon complete, he sat down.

The song leader stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, nearly laughing,

"For our closing song, Let us sing Hymn #365, "Shall We Gather at the River."

Smile, life is too short not to !!
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Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary...WHAT does yur Garden Grow???





...and here be a differant kind of "pair"....





...and whatdya call these..."Jalopenis peppers"....


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Hmmm...interesting take.....

Subject: FW: What a Black Columnist has to say about Obama.

Ken Blackwell - Columnist for the New York Sun

It's an amazing time to be alive in America. We're in a year
of firsts in this presidential election: the first viable woman candidate;
the first viable African-American candidate; and, a candidate who is the
first frontrunning freedom fighter over 70. The next president of America
will be a first.

We won't truly be in an election of firsts, however, until we
judge every candidate by where they stand. We won't arrive where we should
be until we no longer talk about skin color or gender. Now that Barack
Obama steps to the front of the Democratic field, we need to stop talking about
his race, and start talking about his policies and his politics. < /SPAN>

The reality is this: Though the Democrats will not have a
nominee until August, unless Hillary Clinton drops out, Mr. Obama is now
the frontrunner, and its time America takes a closer and deeper look at him.

Some pundits are calling him the next John F. Kennedy. He's not. He's the next George McGovern. And it's time people learned the facts.

Because the truth is that Mr. Obama is the single most liberal
senator in the entire U.S. Senate. He is more liberal than Ted Kennedy,
Bernie Sanders, or Mrs. Clinton. Never in my life have I seen a presidential
frontrunner whose rhetoric is so far removed from his record. Walter Mondale
promised to raise our taxes, and he lost. George McGovern promised military
weakness, and he lost. Michael Dukakis promised a liberal domestic agenda,
and he lost.

Yet Mr. Obama is promising all those things, and he's not
behind in the polls. Why? Because the press has dealt with him as if he were
in a beauty pageant. Mr. Obama talks about getting past party, getting past
red and blue, to lead the United States of America. But let's look at the
more defined strokes of who he is underneath this superficial "beauty."

Start with national security, since the president's most
important duties are as commander-in-chief. Over the summer, Mr. Obama
talked about invading Pakistan, a nation armed with nuclear weapons; meeting
without preconditions with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who vows to destroy Israel
and create another Holocaust; and Kim Jong II, who is murdering and starving
his people, but emphasized that the nuclear option was off the table against
terrorists - something no president has ever taken off the table since we
created nuclear weapons in the 1940s. Even Democrats who have worked in
national security condemned all of those remarks. Mr. Obama is a
foreign-policy novice who would put our national security at risk.

Next, consider economic policy. For all its faults, our health
care system is the strongest in the world. And free trade agreements,
created by Bill Clinton as well as President Bush, have made more goods more
affordable so that even people of modest means can live a life that no one
imagined a generation ago. Yet Mr. Obama promises to raise taxes on "the
rich." How to fix Social Security? Raise taxes. How to fix Medicare? Raise
taxes. Prescription drugs? Raise taxes. Free college? Raise taxes. Socialize
medicine? Raise taxes. His solution to everything is to have government take
it over. Big Brother on steroids, funded by your paycheck.

Finally, look at the social issues. Mr. Obama had the audacity
to open a stadium rally by saying, "All praise and glory to God!" but says
that Christian leaders speaking for life and marriage have "hijacked" -
hijacked - Christianity. He is pro-partial birth abortion, and promises to
appoint Supreme Court justices who will rule any restriction on it
unconstitutional. He espouses the abortion views of Margaret Sanger, one of
the early advocates of racial cleansing. His spiritual leaders endorse
homosexual marriage, and he is moving in that direction. In Illinois, he
refused to vote against a statewide ban on all handguns in the state. These
are radical left, Hollywood, and San Francisco values, not Middle America
values.

The real Mr. Obama is an easy target for the general election.
Mrs. Clinton is a far tougher opponent. But Mr. Obama could win if people
don't start looking behind his veneer and flowery speeches. His vision of
"bringing America together" means saying that those who disagree with his
agenda for America are hijackers or warmongers. Uniting the country means
adopting his liberal agenda and abandoning any conflicting beliefs.

But right now everyone is talking about how eloquent of a
speaker he is and - yes - they're talking about his race. Those should never
be the factors on which we base our choice for president. Mr. Obama's
radical agenda sets him far outside the American mainstream, to the left of
Mrs. Clinton.

It's time to talk about the real Barack Obama. In an election
of firsts, let's first make sure we elect the person who is qualified to be
our president in a nuclear age during a global civilizational war.


According to The Book of Revelations:

The anti-christ will be a man, in his 40s, of MUSLIM descent,
who will deceive the nations with persuasive language, and have a MASSIVE
Christ-like appeal....the prophecy says that people will flock to him and he
will promise false hope and world peace, and when he is in power, will
destroy everything.

Is it OBAMA??

I STRONGLY URGE each one of you to repost this as many times
as you can! Each opportunity that you have to send it to a friend or media
outlet...do it!

If you think I am crazy...I'm sorry but I refuse to take a
chance on the "unknown" candidate.

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Sunday, March 16, 2008

Tuesday... Here be some GREAT Cajun.. Short Ribs Jambalaya...

Well Sir...me good buddy "Charlie the Cop" from out Chicago way sent me this here GREAT recipe, so I made it this past Sunday...and WOW...If'n ya like Cajun cookin...y'all just gonna love this...



Short Ribs Jambalaya....

While many ingredients in a Louisiana jambalaya are subject to variation, rice is essential. This one-pot dish features tender, boneless short ribs, which imbue the rice with a rich, meaty flavor. The finished jambalaya should be moist but not soupy. Have hot sauce available for those who prefer it spicy.

2 lb. boneless beef short ribs
4 teaspoons Creole or Cajun seasoning
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 onion, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1/2 cup chopped celery
2 large garlic cloves, minced
1 (28-oz.) can diced tomatoes, drained
4 cups reduced-sodium beef broth, divided
2 bay leaves
2 teaspoons chopped fresh thyme
2 cups long-grain white rice
8 green onions, thinly sliced
1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

1. Heat oven to 350°F. Cut ribs into 2-inch pieces. In small bowl, stir together Creole seasoning and pepper; sprinkle over ribs.

2. Heat oil in heavy large pot or Dutch oven over medium-high heat until hot. Add ribs in batches; cook 3 to 4 minutes or until browned, turning once. Place on plate.

3. Reduce heat to medium. Add onion, bell pepper, celery and garlic; cook 8 to 10 minutes or until softened, stirring occasionally. Return ribs and any accumulated juices to pot; add tomatoes, 2 cups of the broth, bay leaves and thyme. Increase heat to medium-high; bring to a boil.

4. Cover pot; place in oven. Bake 1 1/2 hours or until meat is tender, stirring halfway through.

5. Remove from oven; return pot to stovetop. Uncover and stir in remaining 2 cups broth; bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Stir in rice, green onions and parsley; cover and return to oven. Bake 30 minutes or until rice is tender and liquid is absorbed. Let stand, covered, 5 minutes.

8 (1 1/2-cup) servings...



...as y'all can tell...I used a Cast Iron Dutch Oven...which in my book...ya cain't beat Cast Iron fer any kind of cookin.....


Again...Thanks mucho Charlie...
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This has got to be one of the best cartoons ever. You women folk will especially appreciate it.....**CLICK TO ENLARGE**


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...and...if'n the Hildebeast should win the election...here be her new plane...


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...ah...finally an answer to this years old problem....


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"How high's the Bullshit mama ? It's 6 feet one and risin..", and some good Irish stuff...

Photobucket...OK... Now that I've got the men-folks attention....here be t'days post...




Sooo...I guess we're all sposed t'believe that after knowin his "Pastor" and his friend fer over 20 years that he didn't know what the "Pastor's" views were regardin America....uh huh...and I got a great bridge fer sale as well....

Hmmmm... Now THIS here be mighty interestin...


Ah...probably just a coincidence...right?





"My friends, we live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you'll join with me as we try to change it." -- Barack Obama


"Life's tough...it's even tougher if you're stupid." ~ John Wayne ~
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Now Sir...speakin of lotsa Blarney...Ya didn't think I'd be fergettin bout the Irish now didja...???

Me good Cat Shamus would like to wish ya.....

A Happy St. Paddy's Day...



Now Sir...If'n Shamus looks kinda pissed off its because his kilt is too tight, he's got a wee bit of a hangover... and we ran out of "Tullamore Dew"....

...and of course, we just have t'have a good Irish joke fer the day....

Patrick & Sean had been out drinkin fer the night, celerbratin the good St. Paddy's Day. After the pub closed they were on their way home and stopped in a local cemetary to rest a spell.

While sittin there fer a few moments, Sean got to thinkin about his mortality and said to Patrick..
"Ah Patrick me ladd, when I die, would ya mind pourin a bottle of Ireland's finest whiskey over me grave?"

Patrick thought about this request fer a moment and answered...

"Sure'n I'd be most happy to Sean me good friend....BUT...would ya be mindin if'n I passed it through me kidneys first?"
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A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard.

Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn and screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell. After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.

He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' License plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper Sticker, And the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, Naturally...I assumed you had stolen the car."
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...and I'll be endin with me good Irish lass of a wife's favorite rendition of "Danny Boy" by "The Celtic Women"....



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Fer Tomorrow: A great recipe fer "Boneless Beef Short Ribs JAMBALAYA"....Mmmm Mmm